


La Douleur Exquise

by Tanalilt



Series: Yuanfen [1]
Category: Pocket Monsters | Pokemon (Main Video Game Series), Pocket Monsters: Ruby & Sapphire & Emerald | Pokemon Ruby Sapphire Emerald Versions
Genre: Alcohol, Archie isn't actually present, M/M, Mild Sexual Content, Mildly Dubious Consent, Minor Violence, Unrequited Love, due to alcohol consumption
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-02
Updated: 2015-03-02
Packaged: 2018-03-16 01:03:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,036
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3468614
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tanalilt/pseuds/Tanalilt
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>'La Douleur Exquise' is a word describing the ache of loving someone you know that you can not have.</p>
            </blockquote>





	La Douleur Exquise

Tabitha should have known better than to offer to drink with his boss.

When he had come into Maxie’s office and seen the man uncharacteristically disgruntled, he should have just turned around and left. Instead, he did what he thought a perfect ~~boy~~ friend would do, and sat down next to the redhead where he sat crumpled on his couch, legs pulled up against his chest and face buried in his knees. Even after that, Tabitha should have known better than to put his hand on Maxie’s knee, keeping it there as he saw his boss flinch. And he never should have offered to pour him a drink.

It started simply enough. Maxie had vaguely pointed to a cupboard he had several nice things stored in; things Tabitha had never really taken the time to look at. Some of the items in it made sense, but others he hadn’t the slightest on – why were there so many books on marine geology? Why the collection of polished-smooth broken up helix fossils and the small ring box, closed, that sat in the far corner of the display? And really, why rum? Maxie had always seemed to be a different type of drinker; fine wines in stemmed glasses held by his spindly fingers, not a shot glass and an old bottle of rum that looked as though it had never been opened. Not wanting to ask questions, though, he had brought over the rum and two shot glasses, pouring one for Maxie and handing it to him (which he shakily took after a few second pause), and one for himself.

It was around Maxie’s third shot that he started to talk.

“I hate rum,” was the first thing he had said that day to Tabitha, who was still holding onto the shot glass after his first, not caring too much for the taste, and having spent all his time trying to talk to Maxie instead of drinking.

Tabitha had appeared surprised. “Why are you drinking it, then?” He took the shot glass from Maxie as the man vaguely indicated that he was about ready to go for another shot, face turning a slight pink as he let his fingers brush up against his boss’. Maxie had seemed to notice, as well, pausing slightly in handing over the glass for a short second before relinquishing it to his administrator.

Maxie stayed silent in response to the question, making a point to avoid any sort of eye contact with Tabitha as he handed back the shot glass now full of amber liquid, quickly putting it away with a cringe on his face. Tabitha hadn’t the slightest idea of how to proceed. It was obviously a delicate situation, he realized; Maxie was drinking, Maxie had something on his mind, Maxie had something he wasn’t willing to say and quite obviously wanted to talk about, or at least a problem that he wanted to have either fixed or forgotten. Unfortunately for Tabitha, he wasn’t someone that Maxie wanted to have this conversation with.

Hesitantly, Tabitha moved closer to his leader on the couch, bringing his own shot glass and the bottle along and setting them on the floor next to his feet. He noticed that Maxie was watching him slowly, out of the corner of his eye, as he looked in a different direction, seemingly tense but not reacting. Taking his chances, Tabitha reached back out to Maxie and set his hand on the man’s knee that was still curled up against his chest, not too far from his face. “You know, Boss…” he started, his thumb rubbing at the side of Maxie’s knee in small circles. Calming. Non-threatening. “If you ever need to talk, or need anything at all, I’m here for you.”

Maxie gazed at him from the corner of his eye for another moment before sighing, letting his head fall over. A few more moments of silence, and Maxie moved, letting Tabitha’s hand slip off of his knee and swung his legs around to the floor, reaching down to the bottle of rum and pouring himself another shot. He looked it over, took the shot, and then after a moment of more consideration, took a drink directly from the bottle before pulling away and coughing, sputtering, letting himself settle on the ground and lean up against the couch. It was easily visible that he hated the taste of the drink, but his determination was not to be changed. Tabitha set a hand on his shoulder, this time not getting a flinch out of him, but instead finding Maxie to be staying completely still.

“Boss… Are you okay?”

“I had an encounter with Team Aqua today,” Maxie replied, almost speaking over Tabitha. He looked straight ahead at the table in front of the couch, and the unused monitor past that, eyes out of focus. Maxie’s hand, however, was shaking slightly on the bottle next to him. “I’m just… a tad unsettled, is all. Nothing some more planning can’t fix.”

Tabitha sat back on the couch. If it was just Team Aqua, it was nothing the team couldn’t handle, right? So why was his boss so concerned about it? “Absolutely right, Boss,” he replied enthusiastically, moving to settle himself behind Maxie on the couch. Tabitha felt he was being bold, but perhaps all his boss needed was someone to talk to; someone to let loose some steam with. He reached to Maxie’s shoulders as the man took another drink from the bottle, causing him to jump and spill slightly. As Tabitha’s hands settled on his shoulders, he felt Maxie take in a deep breath before letting his head fall forward again slightly. The rum had quite evidently gotten to him. Seeing that he had settled, Tabitha started running his thumbs in circles into the muscles in Maxie’s back, massaging out some of the tension that seemed to constantly be building there.

For several minutes, Maxie allowed Tabitha to work out the tense knots of his shoulders, small sounds of appreciation floating from his mouth every once in a while, bringing a smile to Tabitha. It may not be the kind of contact he had wanted, but it was a start. Maxie was inebriated enough to not be his tense self, and the one shot Tabitha had was just enough for him to already be able to say ‘why not?’ Besides, Maxie’s back had so many knots in it. So much stress. He wondered often how his boss handled so much without any visible form of release; He was almost always working, save for rare occasions such as this evening, and his room showed no signs of hobbies, and no signs of someone relations with others. But Maxie seemed to be enjoying the thumbs digging into his back, if his small noises were any indication.

Tabitha smiled, starting to get more personal with his touches; letting his fingertips move across Maxie’s shoulders and upper back, moving slightly down his arm before coming back up, pressing and massaging lightly at the base of his neck, and on the top and front of his shoulders. “Between the two of us, Boss, Team Aqua and that bastard Archie can’t do a damn thing to us,” Tabitha continued speaking, but stopped his hands from moving immediately as Maxie tensed up. He kept his hands steady on his boss’ back, listening and hearing that Maxie’s breathing had stopped; the man was holding his breath. Tabitha leaned down, head poking around to see Maxie as he stared ahead. “Boss?” He asked carefully. “Boss, you’re freakin’ me out—“

“Don’t mention that imbicile in my presence ever again,” Maxie snapped, pulling forward and out of Tabitha’s grip to stand, wobbling slightly from the speed with which he stood up. Afraid that his boss might hurt himself in his drunken state, Tabitha jumped up with him, standing just in front of the couch for only as long as it took Maxie to turn right back around and shove him back down. Tabitha stayed where he was as Maxie leaned down to grab the bottle at his feet, taking deep drink, barely coughing after such a large amount as he had done before, moving to straddle his administrator, one leg between Tabitha’s and the other to his side, gesturing with both the bottle and his finger in his admin’s face. “That bastard’s name doesn’t deserve to reach my ears – he doesn’t even deserve my thoughts, but the fucker has those, still, too! Even after all of these years!”

Tabitha was speechless, caught in between several different states of mind. On one hand, his boss was now a concerning level of drunk, and seemed to be an angry drunk at that. On the other hand, here was Maxie – the Maxie he had admired and snuck glances at for years, his pale face flushed red and hair askew, and himself trapped beneath him with his boss’ leg dangerously close to his crotch and his admittedly-not-entirely-flaccid penis.

Though he never liked when that rage was directed at himself, Tabitha loved seeing his Maxie angry. The passion in his voice, in his face and eyes hidden beneath that calm brought thoughts to Tabitha of the ways in which the man might act behind closed doors. He thought about the ways in which he might calm the fiery beast that is the Great Leader Maxie, pinning the man beneath him and making him moan him with his deft hands. He thought of the rage overwhelming him; Maxie pinning him to a wall and fucking him mercilessly. And now, with the man hovering over top of him, all of these thoughts came at once.

“Boss—- I’m sorry, I—“

“I always fucking hated your hair,” Maxie seethed, seemingly out of the blue, grabbing Tabitha by the hair at the side of his head, causing a cry out of Tabitha as he was caught by surprise, his scalp aching as it was pulled a little too harshly. He looked about ready to ask what Maxie was doing, before he spoke over him again. “Your fucking ink-black hair. You do your job, one of the few idiots who does things well—“Tabitha tried to smile at this; tried to thank him for the compliment, as Maxie took another drink from the bottle. “But I constantly want to rip that fucking hair out of your head – what gives you the right to look anything like him?”

Tabitha’s eyes were watering as Maxie continued to tug at his hair, the man only a few inches from his face and breath reeking of rum. “Boss – You’re hurting me—“ he managed to get out, Maxie quickly releasing the dark hair from between his pale fingers. He remained just as close, though – breathing heavy as he hovered over Tabitha, whose mind was running wild trying to connect the dots. He had mentioned no name but the Aqua Captain’s – which is the only name that could have brought him into such a rage. It made sense, as well – the pirate had dark hair, same as Tabitha’s, but that’s where the similarities ended. (This, of course, seemed to mean nothing to Maxie.)

As he struggled to figure out what was going on, Tabitha watched Maxie look him over, the emotion behind his eyes changing what seemed to be every few seconds, leaning closer and then pulling back slightly, as if he couldn’t decide what decision to make. After what seemed to be a long internal debate, Tabitha watched Maxie’s eyes close as the man leaned into him, and much to Tabitha’s astonishment and utmost delight, pressing his lips against Tabitha’s in a passionate push, tongue slipping into Tabitha’s open mouth immediately.

He grabbed onto the leader, reveling in the feeling of the man against him as he had dreamed about for so long. His fingers twined into Maxie’s hair felt soft and well-maintained, just as he had always expected. Maxie’s face was smooth, and the severe frame of his glasses pushed against Tabitha’s cheek as they pushed awkwardly between them. Tabitha moaned at his leader’s hands running up and down his chest, down his arms and around his neck, feeling every inch of him and almost whimpering as his kisses were returned. Bravely, Tabitha unzipped the front of Maxie’s top, moving his hands in to wrap around his waist, fingers playing with the belt loops of his pants. Mind running a mile a minute, Tabitha tried to take in every bit about Maxie he could. His hair, his skin (so smooth – he must have shaved twice a day)… his body so lithe he could feel his ribs through the sweater.

Maxie tasted… of rum. Tabitha thought, mildly disappointed, that his leader might taste of something else – of cinnamon and cigarettes, and of curry and sake. Of the things that made Maxie who he was. Instead, all he tasted of is rum – rum and salt, and the sea air and, with Maxie’s tongue down his throat and his hands pulling at Tabitha’s zipper and belt, it occurred to him that rum and salt and the sea air was exactly what Maxie wanted to taste.

Tabitha moved his hands out to push against Maxie’s chest, feeling an almost tangible ache in his heart as he broke lip contact with the man, whose face was flush and breathing was hard with a moan fresh on his tongue, whimpering out –

“Archie—“

He should have known better than to drink with his boss.

He should have known better than to think that Maxie could possibly ever hold any interest in him.

As Maxie pushed back in, trying to land another kiss on Tabitha, the admin kept the man at a distance, feeling like his arms would give out in defeat even more with each passing second he was keeping his leader from him. He was so eager – Tabitha could easily pick him up and turn him, kiss the man silly and make love to him right there on the couch. He could finally be close to Maxie – finally show him just how amazing Tabitha could be for him. But he wouldn’t want it. No matter what he did, Maxie had just made it apparent that he would never want Tabitha – only Archie. He could serve as a stand-in for the other man he supposed – it seemed to have made sense to Maxie when he was so heavily intoxicated, but he didn’t think his own heart would be in it. He didn’t think he could take advantage of Maxie’s intoxication and lust in this way.

Another whine from Maxie. “Archie—please, I miss you – Arceus, Archie, I miss you so much—“Maxie’s hands gripped at him, pulling Tabitha close as the admin resisted, finally managing to push Maxie from his lap, turning him around to sit on the couch on his own, Tabitha stumbling to his feet as he watched his leader tremble slightly, looking up at Tabitha with a combination of haziness and recognition. He knew it wasn’t Archie. But Tabitha could tell – part of him just wanted to pretend.

“Leader Maxie…” Tabitha started, biting at his lip and trying to straighten himself out, wishing his pants were just a little looser to hide the obvious erection in his shorts, similar to the one Maxie had in his. Maxie’s face changed, starting to look hurt, almost as though he had been slapped. “I can’t.” Tabitha told him, hearing his own voice shake very slightly as he told off his boss.

“I can be your administrator. I can be your Tabitha—because I am dying to continue, and it kills me to tell you no. But…” The look on his face read very clearly as recognition – the surprise of realizing what he had done and to whom. Just as suddenly as it had started, the look disappeared again, and as though he were sobered, Maxie’s face went back to its impression of neutral that he usually wore. Tabitha finished speaking. “I can’t be your Archie. I don’t think I can take that.”

Maxie stood up, suddenly enough that he struggled to keep his balance, showing that though he may have sobered up in part, he had still taken in far more alcohol than his body could handle. Turning away, Maxie tried to walk over to his desk, little over two yards away, stumbling in the process and being caught by Tabitha, who grabbed his shoulder and his hand to keep the man steady and keep him from falling. He could feel Maxie tensing under his grip as his leader stopped in front of the desk.

“I can be your Tabitha, though…” he said, ensuring that Maxie could support himself in his current state against the desk before bringing his hand up between the two of them, trying to meet Maxie’s eyes. The man kept looking down instead. “I can be your Tabitha—and I will be there for you, no matter where our road leads.” Maxie seemed to want nothing of it, trying to pull his hand from Tabitha’s, as the admin hung on just a few seconds longer, voice growing more worried as he spoke. “I can show you just how good I can make you feel, Leader Maxie—Please, just—“

“Go away.”

Tabitha was stunned into silence. One last tug freed Maxie’s hand from his grip, and the Magma leader placed both of his hands into his lab coat pocket.

“Please. Go.”

Maxie pulled away, unevenly walking around his desk until he came to his chair, letting himself fall into the chair. One hand pulled out of his pocket, elbow up onto the desk as he leaned his head into it, long fingers threading through red hair. Tabitha held a hand out, as if to touch him – console him. Something. After a moment, he pulled his hand back to his side, formal as his pose would allow him with the ache he felt in his chest, and gave a curt bow.

“Of course, Leader Maxie. I will be back to check on you in the morning.”

He left without another word, back to his own room. Perhaps a few more drinks could help him forget about the events of the day as well.


End file.
